hurray! i don't feel like i'm a useless person anymore (at least, for the moment tsk!) , hahaha not really (useless) but you know when you're not busy and don't have something else to do, all your insecurities will start building up inside of you.
just few days ago, me and my bestfriend since 1st grade started venturing a small business. we do buy and sell clothes, accessories and etc. we're just starting and i really don't know if we'll fail or succeed knowing that there are a lot of people who already done or still doing this. we live far away from each other and we don't talk everyday but because of this, we now often communicate via sms, this is our sort of bonding lately. supposedly, she's getting married next year with her long-time boyfriend whom she loved so dearly but right now she's single again. i know there are times she feels lonely too and i am so sorry to hear all her stories, i can't do anything to change the event just to make her happy. i aim that both of us will earn sooner or later (out of this new venture) but for me, this is not all business.. this is about doing something to forget the pain of being single and to remind ourselves about the benefits of being one.
i handpicked most of the items that we sell, so one of my fears is will they like my style/taste? and everytime i feel scared, i pat my shoulder and whisper to myself you're just doing right (this is crazy). everyday you wake up feeling excited thinking about new strategies. i love this feeling, it's keeping me alive and inspired. there are a lot of uncertainties ahead but i'm still willing to take the risks (especially that i'm using my own money wooooh!). this is like riding a rollercoaster, you know that it's scary but you'll still buy a ticket to experience that breathtaking ride for whatever personal fulfillment you desire. :D
for now this is what i have learned, the best way to forget your insecurities, loneliness and other negative feelings is to keep yourself busy doing something you are interested about. ^_^
